You Are So Loved

Dear Mark, I’ve never cared much for Valentine’s Day. It has always seemed like a made up “holiday.” Admittedly, it is a nice excuse to get dressed up and go out for a fancy dinner, but until last year, it... Continue reading →

Grocery Store Woes

This blog entry was actually written almost two weeks ago. I know that this may be surprising, but I haven’t had a chance to post it until this evening. :) Dear Mark, I’d like to tell you about your very... Continue reading →

Hours

Last October, I remember waking up heartbroken each morning anxious about the idea of carrying another child at some point. Here I am, one year later, still heartbroken and anxious, but hours away from giving birth to our second child.... Continue reading →

Days Like This

“This is your second, right?” Yes, second. “How old is your little girl?” She would have been one year old this summer. “What do you mean, would have been [one year old]?” Well, our daughter passed away. “What happened?” Remaining... Continue reading →

Fear

Throughout the last year, Matt and I have created several traditions to honor the memory of Isabelle. These traditions have been a source of comfort and are reminders that she will always be a part of our family. Among the... Continue reading →

A Year of Firsts

July 25th marks one year since my daughter was born. Like all new parents, this life-changing event brought with it a year of firsts. My firsts just don’t look like everyone else’s firsts. I remember the first time that I... Continue reading →

I Hate July

I’ve been throwing around blog post ideas for the last week or so, but nothing seemed to quite fit. With Isabelle’s birthday approaching, it occurred to me why: I just really hate July. I have been dreading July for months.... Continue reading →

The Gift of Friendship

Last weekend, my dear childhood friend and her four smiling children came for a visit. Her husband works for a university and was out of the country teaching for a while. We thought it would be a great opportunity to see... Continue reading →

Packing Boxes

For months, Isabelle’s nursery sat relatively untouched. In the fall, I only entered it a handful of times, typically to add cards or mementos to the growing stack on the floor in front of the crib. The thought of being... Continue reading →

The Mask of a Grieving Parent

Grieving parents wear masks. Sometimes the face that you see is real, and other times it is not our face at all, but rather a mask. We wear masks because we fear that some people don’t want to know how... Continue reading →