Leaving our house for the holidays has felt a bit like I am leaving my daughter behind while we are going off to celebrate Christmas. I have struggled a bit with these emotions even though I know that our daughter is not physically here with us anymore. Isabelle gets to celebrate Christmas with Jesus himself. I should be excited about that.
While on an airplane to visit my parents this week, I looked out the window and observed our plane’s shadow on the clouds below us. It was pretty neat to watch. After a few minutes, I began to notice what looked like a rainbow making a circle around the plane’s shadow. I blinked a few times to make sure I wasn’t just imagining it. Yet, there it was, a perfect circle rainbow around our plane’s shadow. Still not convinced, I asked my husband to look out the window to see if he noticed the rainbow. Sure enough, he did!
If you have read my blog for any length of time, you know that rainbows are a very important symbol in my grieving journey. (See Isabelle’s Rainbows) After such a beautiful reminder of God’s love for us and of my daughter’s presence in heaven, here are my thoughts:
Isabelle, I hear you loud and clear! I know that you are rejoicing in heaven with all the angels and saints where there is no pain and crying. You are celebrating the birthday of our Savior with Jesus himself. So, even though I may feel like I left you behind in North Carolina, I know that you aren’t actually there anymore. Instead, you are a part of the biggest party ever. I should be celebrating the fact that many years ago Jesus was born and then later chose to die so that you and so many others could be hanging out with Him in heaven.
So, today I am choosing to say Merry Christmas! Thank you God, for giving us your Son, and thank you for allowing my daughter to give us that small reminder.
This picture is from last Christmas, Isabelle’s first Christmas, when we announced our pregnancy.